There is much to do today and coming to this place seems difficult lately, but I am drawn here, to type out words that will be sent to the other side of the screen where you are. Even with all the negative non-personal side of social media, I still find great encouragement here. I find comfort in reaching out, in being honest, in publically working through struggles, fleshing out my faith. Thank you for the grace you give in return.
Yesterday we got the news that Dad was not recertified with hospice. What that means, among other things, is that we must find a replacement for his wheelchair (read about it here) and his special mattress by tomorrow. We are hoping that the facility will be able to find a good one in their inventory. This change in his “status” reminds me that we are on a long journey, much longer than we had thought. I am not always okay with this. There are more days than not when Mom and I feel like Dad responds more positively to others than to us. That’s not always easy to take. Last night as I went into Dad’s room to grab his blanket, my eye caught a little sign on his bulletin board. He may have given some of you a copy at some point… “For this I have Jesus”. Can I be honest? I struggled with that thought for a moment or two… for what? for sitting in a nursing home unable to walk, talk, and be totally dependant on others… what exactly does that mean? It reminded me of another question I asked and Mom’s response.
This morning’s reading in Jesus Calling by Sarah Young, could not have been more timely…
Approach problems with a light touch. When your mind moves toward a problem area, you tend to focus on that situation so intensely that you lose sight of Me. You pit yourself against the difficulty as if you had to conquer it immediately. Your mind gears up for battle, and your body becomes tense and anxious. Unless you achieve total victory, you feel defeated.
There is a better way. When a problem starts to overshadow your thoughts, bring this matter to Me. Talk with Me about it and look at it in the Light of My Presence. This puts some much-needed space between you and your concern, enabling you to see from my perspective. You will be surprised at the results. Sometimes you may even laugh at yourself for being so serious about something so insignificant.
You will always find trouble in life. But more importantly, you will always have Me with you, helping you to handle whatever you encounter. Approach problems with a light touch by viewing them in My revealing light.
Psalm 89:15, John 16:33
For this I have Jesus!
And as Ann Voskamp says, “thanksgiving always precedes the miracle”.
So let’s walk through this day with a light touch and much thanksgiving in our hearts, expecting a miracle. He has not let us down yet.
Your prayers bring much encouragement… to me, to Mom, to our family.
Thank you. Mean it.